Tuesday, April 03, 2007

A Plethora of Diseases

Alzheimer's disease. Attention Deficit Disorder. Asperger’s syndrome. Peripheral Artery Disease. Restless Leg Syndrome. Epstein Barr Syndrome. Chronic Fatigue. Adrenal Fatigue.

I don't remember any of these diseases existing twenty or thirty years ago. What used be called senility is now Alzheimer's disease. Kids that used to be disobedient brats are now coddled as having Attention Deficit Disorder or Asperger's syndrome. Kids used to call me wuss, adults said that I was shy. A shrink once said that I had clinical depression. Now I find out I've got Adrenal Fatigue Syndrome. It reminds me of the SUV commercial where the adrenaline deficient guy is tying his shoes a few inches away from a vicious dog. That's different than Epstein Barr Syndrome, which is a bit more specific than Chronic Fatigue. I have no idea where Restless Leg Syndrome came from. I think that's just "medicalese" for tossing-and-turning-at-night. And that peripheral artery disease is a new one on me too. It's supposed to be numb legs, and cold hands and feet. I'm not sure what blood circulation has to do with reluctance to socialize. Do you suppose Jennifer Willbanks could blame her Runaway Bride condition on PAD?

Honestly, I think doctors are inventing all these new diseases, just to have something to treat us for. Why don't they do something useful, and come up with a cure for being stupid, deluded, moonbat, liberal or Democrat?

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

RLS is medicalese for a movement disorder, known in literature for over 400 years, and to medical science for 70 years. They do not yet know the cause, but have found it related to the substantia nigra, iron uptake and dopmaine production. The symptoms are parathesias (weird, uncomfortable, or painful feelings) in the legs, arms and sometimes other body parts. The only way to get rid of the feelings is to move, hence the "restless" part. It occurs most often in the legs, hence the legs part.