Saturday, July 01, 2006

Imadumbjihad

Maybe I should commit to writing a bunch of stories once a week. I can’t seem to come up with enough time and stories together to write a blog every day like the professional bloggers do.

Maniac Too

No more sign of the maniac that chased me down the street last week. But the preponderance of maniacs has got me to wondering. And watching out for more of them. Could this be another Summer Of Shark Attacks? Oh, this year it’s alligators.

Let’s play a little game (queue music).
One of these things is not like the other.
One of these things is not the same.
One of these things is not like the other.
One of these things does not belong.
  1. Maniac: Mahmoud Imadumbjihad
    ”There was no holocaust. It was a hoax.”
    ”Imagine a world without Zionism.”
    ”We will wipe Israel off the map.”
    ”Iran has a right to have nuclear weapons too.”
    ”We’re not refining uranium for nuclear weapons, we’re developing nuclear energy”

  2. Maniac: George W. Bush
    ”Threatening the world with nuclear weapons is no civilized way to start negotiations.”
    ” Now some people would be willing to trade in my liberty in order to strengthen the hand of the madman in the whitehouse.”
    ”Make no mistake. The United States will hunt down and punish those responsible for these cowardly acts. We will do whatever is necessary to protect America.”

  3. Maniac: Kim Jo Ill Lee… North Korea
    (… silence… )
    (… missile launch… )
    (… silence… )
    ”My people are starving. Please give us some food.”
    (… silence… )
    (… bigger missile launch… )
    (… silence… )
    ”Give my people food… or I will do something… awful… to you.”

Hint: “Deep Throat” on The X-Files said that a truth is best hidden between two lies.

Dog Blog

There’s a notice up by the mailboxes at the StoneHead Condominiums stating that mail is not being delivered because of an “aggressive dog” that attacked the mailman. Residents are supposed to pick up their mail at the post office. I don’t know if the dog that attacked the mailman is the same one that attacked me, or if it’s the same one that I hear snarling from behind the door as I walk down the hall.

Never mind that Ruteger’s Spoon Footpath is the shortest street with the longest name. I think the residents of the StoneHead Condominiums must be a bunch of stoners. There’s been two separate occasions of chronic complainers not being able to locate the newspaper that’s delivered right to their very door. Both of them are from StoneHead. Maybe the vicious dog is the newspaper thief.

A New Conspiracy Theory

I wouldn’t want the left wing loonies to have all the fun with inventing crazy conspiracy theories. Back when I was an X-File fan, I thought the conspiracy theories were intriguing. Now, they just piss me off.

First, nobody’s talking about the details of the secret anti-terror program leaked by the NY Times except for Al Jazeera. The American MSM is just talking about who leaked, who and whether or not to prosecute, that the President has been talking about tracking banking transactions since the beginning. Nobody except Al Jazeera is talking about the SWIFT program, that it only tracks international transactions, that only very large transactions are of interest, that only transactions involving suspect terrorists is subpoenaed, that domestic transactions and ordinary American citizens are completely out of the picture.

Here’s a new conspiracy theory for current events surrounding the NY Times leak of the secret anti-terror program. It should be obvious that with the extensive coverage of the SWIFT program, any intelligent terrorist operative will henceforth shun large international transactions through any bank connected with the SWIFT network. My theory is that the SWIFT program has run it’s course, and that the CIA wanted to preemptively change the scenario. By intentionally “leaking” this deal to the NYT / Al Jazeera news channel, the CIA is shifting the financial transactions into some other new funding channel, which they are now carefully monitoring. I obviously don’t have details, but I can say that,
  1. It’s not through banks associated with SWIFT, and

  2. It’s not large transactions, and

  3. Whoever starts getting a lot funds flowing in matching the above two criteria are possible terrorist suspects.


Financial Times Loves Imadumbjihad

I don’t see why anyone subscribes to the Financial Times. It can’t even catch the plane from Dallas to Denver in time for distribution half the time. Yet the small readership remains loyal, even through all the non-delivery and delayed delivery days. It must be because The People’s Republic of Boulder is so full of a bunch of left-wing liberals that are as head-over-heals in love with the Islamofascists as the Financial Times is.

FT recently ran a headline story highlighting the accolades of Iranian president Mahmoud Ahmadi-Nejad (hyphen and capital “N” included in FT’s spelling) AKA “Imadumbjihad.” This calls for a corroboration of FT’s reporting with other sources. Primarily, there is a Wikipedia article that discusses the controversies surrounding Mahmoud Imadumbjihad.

Going back to the 1979 hostage crisis, there are five former hostages who have positively identified this man as one of their captors. Regarding the 1979 events, FT says
“On one hand, his victory in a lively election [2005] boosted Iran’s ‘religious democracy’ and showed the egalitarian slogans of the 1979 revolution could still motivate the masses and rewrite a political agenda that had divided Iran between ‘reformists’ and ‘conservatives’.”
So 1979 was not a time when Imadumbjihad banded with a bunch of Islamic fundamentalist student hooligans, over-ran the American embassy, took 52 Americans hostage for 444 days, and broke off diplomatic relations between the countries, but instead was a year when Iran came into it’s own, joined the civilized world, and recognized human rights. Elsewhere, the article simply says that the student leaders of the 1979 hostage crisis denied Imadumbjihad’s involvement.

Fast forward to the 2005 election in which Imadumbjihad gained power. Wikipedia article details allegations of election fraud, in which he essentially strong-armed his way into power. The FT is quick to point out his rising popularity and altruistic shepherding of the Iranian people toward success.
“Mr Ahmadi-Nejad won on a slogan of “bring oil money to the people’s sofreh” (dining cloth) and quickly showed an understanding of the Iranian masses lacking not just in Mr Bush but in his own predecessor, the reformist Mohammad Khatami.”
February 2006, amidst the much-publicized Danish Mohammed Cartoon controversy, Imadumbjihad denies that the holocaust happened. It was another trademark “in your face” response to western civilizations outrage at the Islamists alarmist response to the Danish newspapers cartoon contest. All those old photos of bodies from the Nazi death camps stacked up like firewood must really be doctored photos of a mannequin factory. Meanwhile, the FT denies that Imadumbjihad denies the holocaust. That feature of the Islamofascist leader’s rise to fame is conveniently forgotten by the FT.

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